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Bikram Vohra
JournalismPakistan.com
October 13, 2014
I am really teed off with all those who read my column or my other stuff that appears in various places around the world sporadically and who write to me and say thanks for putting a smile on our faces.
So how about putting a smile on my face?
Two years ago my daughters put me on to Twitter. I never tweeted but I had 48 followers. What they were following I have no idea but I guess they kept going that I would one day affirm their faith in me.
Then my friend told me that one way to get huge numbers of followers (love them, followers, that is) is to tweet messages in 135 characters and watch them lemming towards you.
Really, I said.
Reallllly, he said, tweets are way out, they are the best way to get your name out there. Since I am big on getting my name out there, wherever there is, I decided okay I am going to tweet and tweet and blow the place apart. People in Alaska and Berne, Dhaka and Tokyo and Mongolia are going to have my name on their lips. Watch out world, here I come.
The first day I tweeted the number soared from 48 to 111. That was good. Watch out Mr Bachan I am right behind you mate and catching up. As for Angelina I should be past her in a couple of days. After all, none of them write brilliantly incandescent stuff so I am watching my figures yes?
And they have risen to 114 in 10 days. Exactly three people in a world of 6 billion have woken up and said to themselves let’s go for @BikramVohra. Three divided by 10 becomes point 33 percent of one person per day.
This is not exciting. This is not soaring figures. This is dead duck in the water stuff and you folks are driving me nuts.
Get out there and read my tweets. I am tired of the number 114. Every time I go to the site I want to see movement. I think it is stuck, maybe, needs a shaking. If something does not happen soon enough I am going into depression and you do not want that on your conscience.
So go out there and do your good deed. Become a follower… for the moment all my tweets are bitter.
(The writer is a Senior Editorial Advisor of Khaleej Times and the paper’s former Editor. He has also been the Editor of Gulf News, Gulf Today, Emirates Today and Bahrain Tribune)
If my call is so important to them, why don’t they answer it for 22 minutes?
How come when I want to, but something specific online is the only item out of stock.
When I get into a queue or lane going fast, the moment I get in, it becomes the slowest and refuses to budge.
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