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Bikram Vohra
JournalismPakistan.com
April 23, 2014
If you keep sending me your travel itinerary. I do not care a whistle in the wind where you are, what you are doing in airport lounges, which hotel you are staying in and what time your flight is leaving.
If you constantly keep informing me that you want Candy Crush lives and endurance of survival for other games that I do not play and you won’t stop sending those reminders.
If you keep sending me pictures of a party you had to which you did not invite me (thank goodness) but have a blast, just don’t pass them on to me.
If you belong to that tribe which believes the whole world is fascinated by their change of picture profile and it ranks up there with being promoted to CEO or breaking a leg. I don’t want to see your new avatar each week or even earlier.
If you keep sending forwards of cartoons and pithy stories and anecdotes and those terrible jokes to 422 people and I am one of them. Get a life and get off my back.
Poetry. You want to read poetry, be my guest, knock yourself out, sit under a tree in a hammock and read and write all the poetry you want, just don’t send it to me.
People who want to tell you to LIKE articles on death, disaster, tragedy and people suffering from incurable diseases. Please stop.
The guy or girl who posts so frequently you see his name and your heart sinks because there it is again and you just dunked him.
People who send you reams of philosophy, long lectures on well-being, health, goodness and sundry schmaltz.
Chain mails and religion, intimidating you into submission and forcing you to send it onwards to 50 others who’ll badmouth you just like you are badmouthing this one.
And eleven: people you just don’t like but cannot press ‘delete’ because you are a sap.
(The writer is a Senior Editorial Advisor of Khaleej Times and the paper’s former Editor. He has also been the Editor of Gulf News, Gulf Today, Emirates Today and Bahrain Tribune)
If my call is so important to them, why don’t they answer it for 22 minutes?
How come when I want to, but something specific online is the only item out of stock.
When I get into a queue or lane going fast, the moment I get in, it becomes the slowest and refuses to budge.
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