JournalismPakistan.com January 23, 2018
It happens. Your friendly neighborhood bank will reject a cheque that you have credited to your account because the date is wrong or the signature does not tally, some silly technical hitch that messes up your budget plans.
Now, you are up the creek and it isn’t as if it bounced but there is no moolah coming. So you have to trek to the bank to collect it after they have sneeringly informed you and then cart it across to the company or person who gave it to you and ask for a replacement because you know what, my friend, you erred grievously and I am suffering for your error.
Now, there exists in all accounts departments some sort of profound resistance to making out the second cheque for a singular work done. That it is entirely their mess is a minor infringement they do not take into consideration. They take your returning it and asking for a fresh one as a personal affront.
Thing is Accounts has done its paperwork and dispatched you a cheque, file closed and now you miserable sod, you have wrecked the system by sending it back and they have to send you another and it is beyond the scope of their comprehension and they cannot wrap their heads around the fact that it is their fault, since Accounts are never at fault. You are now well on the way to being labeled a nuisance making unreasonable demands and even when you elect to apologize to them for their mistake it isn’t enough.
So after the first week and no progress and a sort of impatient irritation at your insistence seeing as how they did send you the first cheque the runaround gets into full swing.
We are looking into the matter. (Why are you looking into it, and what matter, give me my money). The second signatory is traveling so we cannot release the cheque (it is a piece of paper, not a Rottweiler, release it, let it go, let it fly into freedom, give me my money). A cheque was sent to you on December 8, 2017, according to our records, which you returned (j’accuse!!! I didn’t return it, the bank did because you got the date wrong and you can take your records and play them on a gramophone, this is January 2018, give me my money.)
Then one day when you have woken up weeping with frustration this company calls you and says, we have conducted our in-house investigation and there was no error on our part, you should be so informed.
OK fine, we’ll collectively slaughter the bank manager, but give me my second cheque. It is under process. Like cheese.
DISCLAIMER: This article is intended to bring a smile to your face. Any connection to events and characters in real life is coincidental.
(The writer is a Senior Editorial Advisor of Khaleej Times and the paper’s former Editor. He has also been the Editor of Gulf News, Gulf Today, Emirates Today and Bahrain Tribune)
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