JournalismPakistan.com September 17, 2013
This is official. Women do not wear 75% of the shoes they buy. It is ridiculous in the extreme as a statement but the research has just been published. Men have two pairs or maybe three if you count your favorite ones which your wife is constantly trying to discard just because they are a bit shabby and old, but we are friends, they have history...we have miles to go, places to leave our footprints and all that.
Women's shoes have no history. They just lie there, like amoeba multiplying so rapidly you cannot keep track. When I read this piece of research I did not believe it. Not just that, but they also buy shoes that look like their other shoes which look like all their other shoes which look exactly like the ones they bought today...Why would they buy it if they weren't going to wear it?
Like with the mountains, because it is there.
No one has yet figured out why shoes do this to women. Men just buy the stuff because we have to and there is brown, black and in between. Period. Plus a pair of sports shoes and our footwear department is off and running.
Women need a cupboard. Maybe two cupboards. It is true. Count it in your own house and you'll realize they are just adding to their collection...you can call it the Imelda Marcos syndrome. Women find sanctuary, comfort, solace, achievement, even success in buying shoes, the more expensive the better. They line them up like soldiers going to war, in a specific order, color, size, representing their mood for the day...actually moods for the day because they can change both several times.
Then when they have bought them, they don't wear them. They also exchange them with friends. Would you exchange your shoes with another man's? No way, sir, no way. But women have this rampaging desire to 'match' their shoes to their clothes so if a friend has a more 'matching' pair, sure, go ahead, borrow it.
I don't know about you but I wouldn't go to a function and look at another man's shoes. Women do. They judge each other by the footwear. It is not an accessory, it is point central and there is no logic to it. None that men can fathom. They even talk about it. Can you imagine a group of men standing around discussing their shoes?
Tell me one woman you know who does not keep shoes in the car to change into and then, when you are going out to a party, actually dwells on which one to wear and agonizes over it.
Then they go shopping. Men see a pair pretty much like the one they already have and just replace it. Women add to the collection. And they truly shop. Have you ever seen a happy-looking shoe salesman in a ladies' store? Why would he be happy if he had to show 364 pairs of shoes until the floor resembles a battlefield of old, victims of rejection strewn all over the place.
Husbands who go shopping with their wives dread entry into a shoe store because there goes the whole T20 match, we are not getting home on time. Read War and Peace by the time she comes out.
To power this purchase orgy women have different categories. High heels, flats, slip-ons, stilettos, flip flops, sneakers, boots, pumps, kitten heels (whatever that is), ballerinas, platforms, wedges, ankle boots, espadrilles, and sandals.
In every home a version of this conversation takes place.
Wife: I can't find my black high heel with the silvery motif.
Husband: I can see 10 of them with silvery motifs, what difference does it make, just wear one.
Wife's expression: Are you crazy, I've already worn them before, don't you understand?
No, we don't. I asked my wife about it and she said, don't even go there, it's a woman thing...Bikram Vohra.
(The writer is a Senior Editorial Advisor of Khaleej Times and the paper’s former Editor. He has also been the Editor of Gulf News, Gulf Today, Emirates Today and Bahrain Tribune)
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